Monday, January 8, 2007

State of the Unit...

Fact: Johnson’s deal is basically finished returning him to the D-backs, Igawa’s official, Doug Mientkewicz is on board for a one year deal, and the Yankee’s lineup is really starting to fill out.

Spank’s Opinion: Well my temporary hiatus fielded quite a bit of news. Randy’s gone. Doug Mie#$@#%1*&%wicz (I don’t get it, I might as well say my name is Rich but it is pronounced like Paul) is in. Murcer is recovering. Igawa’s an official striper (not stripper, man that would be funny, though in a creepy/ugly way). Etc Etc. Etc. Oh the humanity. What is important here, is the Yankees have too many healthy players. Yes that’s right, too many. Thank you Lord on high. And not all of them are back from recovery at the glue farm. In fact the median age for the Yankees as of now is lower than 47, which is a huge improvement of late. Pavano is apparently healthy, which makes one day in the last three years, and Pettite is back in the pins’. I love it. We look like a rotation again. The rest of the team is looking great as well. Our middle infield will be solid for as long as the captain sees fit, and the corners are the only infield positions that are seemingly up in the air. However even those positions are looking less precarious every day. Mientkiewicz will make a solid first basemen for the Yanks and A-Rod will probably disappoint all by only hitting .290 with 121 RBIs and only 35 HRs, deplorable isn’t he. The outfield is pretty much set with Matsui, Damon, and Abreu in left, center, and right respectively with Cabrera on the bench. Giambi will most likely become a full time DH. “Spank Man, what does all this mean?” you ask? Bernie Williams is gone. I know I am going to get a lot of crap for saying this, but I’m going to anyway. Bernie Williams is like a bad houseguest. If someone doesn’t tell him to leave, he’ll be here forever. Bernie has never had a good arm, he hasn’t been faster than the average Joe in about five years, and he’s behind any pitch that isn’t coming from the hand of a guy whose name begins with a “W” and ends with an “akefield.” He’s old, he’s done, he’s washed up. Bernie we had fun, but you’re killing me. Joe needs to specifically tell Bernie that he should retire respectably as a Yankee great and continue with his jazz career. I just don’t get it -Joe and Steinbrenner is nothing but cut-throat with everyone in the program but Bernie. I know, I loved him too, but it’s time to let go. Love ya Bern, it’s been fun, we’ll visit you in Florida.

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